New Post.
No, really, this is a new post. Thank you to all who have had kind words for me during this time of illness. It really has meant a lot. Not one person has said, so far, "oh, just suck it up and be quiet." I thank you to those who refrained from giving me that suggestion.
Yesterday was Ed's birthday. He's 36. Wow. That seems so old to me. He was 29 when I met him, and that seemed old to me too. Now I'm 29, and it still seems old to me! But not for long, 30 is coming along this March.
We have been busy this week with a little project, my husband and I. It's a little something I like to call, "let's try and remember what sex was like before we were trying to conceive." Oh yeah! I completely forgot! It was fun!
It started with an argument last weekend, an argument that ended in the discussion of what trying to make a baby, unsuccessfully, for 10 months, did to our sex life. And to our connection to each other. And then of course, it evolved, into us reminding each other of what we had been missing out on....twice. I hope I'm not crossing the line for any of you reading this, but it has been a very long time since we did the deed twice...in one day. Trying to conceive sex, which some of you know a lot about, can be pure psychological torture for both involved. And this isn't the good kind of sexual torture...
I know to many of you 10 months is a drop in the bucket compared to what you have gone through or are going through. But it's also no day at the beach. If you've ever gone through this, you know what it can do to your self esteem, your faith in your body, your faith in your partner (will he still love me?), and even your faith in yourself as a woman. Now, I'm not saying that all of these things SHOULD be tied up in our fertility, I'm just saying that for many of us, these things are tied up in our fertility. Something we might not have known if we got pregnant the first time every time.
So it has been nice, really nice, to say the least. All those months I wished that I could just put aside my feelings about getting pregnant, just let go, and have passionate sex with my husband, only to find that it was an impossible thing for me to do. I'm so glad we could reconnect. I wish we had found a way to do it sooner.
Oh, and the Zofran? It helps, but I still threw up twice today, and have spent most of the rest of the day trying not to. I hope it lets up a little soon. I'll be 11 weeks tomorrow!
posted by ErinMary @ 2:16 PM
4 comments
4 Comments:
Well, hopefully it isn't too much longer until you start feeling much much better!! It was good to hear from you and know how you are doing!
Hey Erin...
Maybe if you "just relax" the nausea will go away...
heeheehee... just because you are pg doesn't mean you are out of the "just relax" club...
Glad to see you are feeling a little better... at least well enough to have wild unabandoned sex between bouts of nausea...
Visit me soon...
S'good you're back I was getting ready to email you because I thought something bad had happened.
Alright girlie...don't make us wait another week for an update! :oÞ
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